Anyone else hate to have their picture taken? I love taking pictures, but hate pictures of myself. I figured I couldn't ask others to pose for me if I myself didn't like to have my picture taken. I had my husband take these for me. I set up all the settings, he'd take a picture, then I would run and see if it turned out alright. I'm starting my own photography business and needed some pictures of myself for my new photography blog http://livilanephotography.blogspot.com/.
I don't think I've had any pictures by myself since my wedding seven years ago. Then I was pregnant for an eternity. Those years of being pregnant are now a blur. After each pregnancy I told myself I'd lose the 55 lbs (or 60-65 whatever) I gained. Then I'd get pregnant again. Now the blur is starting to clear and I've aged and my body has carried four children. In my mind, I should be getting back to the way I was when I got married. Right?
How wrong I am! I feel like God is teaching me to be happy with myself. To see past my own crow's feet. (I had no idea I had crow's feet until I looked at these pictures.) God gifted me with my children and I need to be proud of the body and face motherhood has given me. Yes, that's right, I said face. Anyone Else's nose shaped different after having kids?
Now that I can see past my own disfigurements (I know that's a strong word, but if you could see the hangy down thing that my stomach has become, you would agree) I can hopefully see other people in a new light, too. Free photography tip: Got big hips? Hide them by throwing a few kids in front of them.
I'm not saying that I won't try to stop losing weight, I will. I do find comfort in liking myself despite my chubby cheeks. Losing weight will be healthy instead of being so destructive to myself esteem. Did you know I saved all the clothes I could fit into before I got pregnant with Laney? Talk about torture! Those clothes will probably never fit me again and I'm totally ok with that.
(All these pictures are black and white because I've realized my teeth are yellow. I'm blaming the coffee addiction.)
Thank you and Good Night!